She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
