"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Randomize
