I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
