is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
