I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize