i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
