First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
