You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
My boob is missing a layer of skin
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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