Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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