not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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