she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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