just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
