If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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