I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
