Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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