Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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