Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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