But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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