How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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