Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
