it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
