it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
