I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
More tranny stories later!
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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