I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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