If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
