Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
