have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
