I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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