none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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