She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
