Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
