hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
