And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Randomize
