i may or may not be watching the land before time
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Randomize
