they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize