Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
