party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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