My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Randomize
