Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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