Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Randomize
