guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Randomize
