i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
