This girl is more easily done than said...
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
