id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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