i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
