My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
should my penis look like a turkey
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
