making cat noises will not fix the situation.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
