He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
