you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
We're too hungover to prance.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
