Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
